Thank God for the Angels

Do you ever wonder how much of our lives angels can see? Specifically, angels we once knew? Sometimes I find myself alone in my room with my thoughts. And then I wonder if there is an angel looking over my shoulder at what I am typing, reading, watching. Or maybe accessing my innermost thoughts without my awareness. I wonder if there are different ranks of access to our lives that God gives the angels. I get a vision of the Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present, and Yet to Come showing Scrooge all the families he offended. Perhaps that is the extent to which they can observe but not interact. And there are times when I lose something and am frantically searching for it, and it turns up in one of the places I could have sworn I’d already looked. And I think to myself, maybe an angel felt bad for me and placed it there. 

As I gain more angels over the years, I try to hold myself to a higher standard. I know that God sees everything and knows my thoughts. But there is something different about an angel you once knew, someone who was once here on earth now with an aerial view of your life they were once unaware of. It puts pressure on you to try harder, to be better. 

Maybe the angels don’t hold us up to a higher standard. Maybe they don’t have it all figured out yet, either. Maybe they just yearn to give us the clues that they can to make our lives a bit easier. Especially the guardian angels. The ones that salvage my phone and myself when my klutzy side takes advantage of my coordination. The ones that whisper consoling words in my moments of worry and doubt. The ones that celebrate the little victories with me when no one else does. 

What about the angels on earth in physical form? The ones who enter our lives unexpectedly and bless us abundantly? If we are angels on earth, how do we know? 

I am thankful for the bliss found in ignorance at times, because perhaps knowing the answers to all these questions could be frightening, intimidating, even. Until I get another clue or nudge in the right direction, I will keep living the best way I know how. And thank God for the angels.

Accept, Consider, Demand

Last Wednesday God blessed me with another year of life. Most years on my birthday, at the stroke of midnight, something comes over me. I feel an overwhelming sense of purpose, maturity, and wisdom. But this year was not the same. And I wondered why. Was it because I was waiting and expecting this day to come? The answer to that was no, because that is exactly what I had done in previous years. So what was it?

I realized that year 27, at least as far as it seems right now, has prepared me for many years to come. Put simply, I went through some things last year that pushed me beyond what I was used to. I had to take a stand on all fronts and demand respect. I came to terms with the fact that I have accomplished more than I thought I would at this age, even though my checklist still remains. Above all, I opened my mind to situations I might never have when I was younger. I truly blossomed into the woman that I am today, that I will be for probably the rest of my life.

That is not to say that I will not grow any further. But I laid the final few stones of the basis for the person that I want to be in the future. Those stones include things that I will not accept, things that I will consider doing, and things that I demand as the standard.

First, things I will not accept. I will not accept being used for what I can do for others. I will not accept being told the extent of my capabilities as a business woman, future physician, or advocate for the community. I will not accept unbalanced friendships or relationships that compromise my creativity or energy.

Second, things I will consider doing. I will consider getting to know those on the “margins of society” so-to-speak. Because their experiences and stories inspire my pursuit of bettering the world in my own power. I will consider performing acts of kindness for those who I know cannot or will not return the favor. Because I know that my karma is not what they do to me, but how I respond. I will consider someone else’s point of view and belief system. Because I am in no position to judge others, regardless of whether or not I believe they are right.

Finally, things I demand as the standard. I demand respect from everyone, whether in a higher or lower position of power than myself. I demand the right to say no to being social if doing so does not serve my happiness or my success. I demand the freedom to express myself without being judged. I demand the Golden Rule: Treat me as you would like to be treated. I demand to be treated as the brilliant mind that I am, that I know we all are. Individually we have diverse talents, but collectively those talents are a force. In my 28 years of being on this earth, I have learned that what you demand of life comes to fruition. Be clear, be passionate, and above all, be sure.